God is so good. It sounds so cliche but It's all I get to learn more and more about in life.
His love is like skin. it's everywhere on you.
have you ever heard of "writer's block"? well, i sort of have been going through something similar, only it's not in my writing. it's in my seeking.
"seeker's block." yeah, for the past 7 months it's been such a hard thing to do, to seek the Lord. i even feel funny calling Him "Lord" because i know i haven't been allowing God to be Lord of everything. just some things.
seeking God has become something extra or even optional instead of something vital and essential.
oh man. my biggest fear has been to fall away. even though in my heart of hearts i know that we will never separate, i fear the numbness that results from disobedience. whenever we don't do what we know is right, there it lies. i can't ignore it anymore.
so i've felt pretty scummy. off and on. but not really repentant. so anyway, i don't like it. i don't like the downward spiral....so last night i was thinking about all this...
have you ever been sooo thirsty that no matter how much liquid you drink, if it's not water, your thirst isn't quenched and when you finally get a bottle of water, you open it up sooo quickly and your fingers are trippy and fumbling and then you finally get the bottle open and you rush the bottle up to your mouth taking in the biggest gulps not caring that some of the water drips down your chin....it's good and it's what your body needs to fight dehydration.
okay so that's what i experienced with God's word...i needed to hear from God immediately and i needed to know if God was sick of me yet. seriously, i know you're probably thinking "doesn't she know about the end of romans 8" but man, with my horrible unfaithfulness and lack of devotion, i just needed to be reassured that God is still at work in me. am i gonna let the devil keep lulling me with apathy? oh HELLLL NO! i say this knowing that i'm still responsible for my disobedience...my choices.
so i opened up the Bible and straight to 1 Timothy i drank...man, i drank....truth is soooo quenching....like, seriously, paul encouraged me. i'm not the worst sinner and God's here for the long haul. so much was said in the first chapter...i wish i could tell you what God underlined but i can't remember it right now...i know, i know, it's like one of those awesome sermons where you take notes because you know you have to go back and review it so it really sinks...so the next blog i'll post this juicy truth on here for ya. drinks on me everyone! cheers!
anyway, this morning i woke up and still with the peace and comfort i received from reading 1 timothy...so i know my relationship with God needs maintanance. i'm ready. today's message at church was sooo right on for me. my relationship with God affects everything.
so happy mother's day after. thank You God for being all You say You are. Perfect for me. awwwwww... :)
No comments:
Post a Comment